Simon "manipulate, mansplain, malewife" Laurent (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
apexredditor) wrote2021-06-27 09:35 am
apexredditor) wrote2021-06-27 09:35 am
(no subject)
-OOC Information-
Player Name: Leah
Player Age: 31
Contact:![[plurk.com profile]](https://plurk.com/favicon.ico)
teenwitch and torture! at the discord
-IC Information-
Character Name: Simon Laurent
Character Age: 18
Canon: Infinity Train
Reserve Link: bam
Bottom Line: A callous, self-serious, and emotionally stunted dork/cult leader who redirects his very real trauma by committing his life to a lie and doubling down on that lie at every turn, even at the cost of his life, best friend, and grip on reality.
History: Who could forget dear rat boy?
About: ► Simon's defining feature is his narcissism, and it colors his other traits and behaviors even when that might not be immediately obvious. Whether he's maintaining that uh, actually he definitely won chubby bunny that one time, or trying to murder his best friend, the source is the same: Simon has to be right. He has a childish idea of what the world around him is, and what it should be, and when anything gets in the way of that he reacts explosively. While we don't know much of anything about his past before becoming a passenger, whatever latent selfishness and low empathy he had prior to the Train were compounded and intensified by the inherent trauma of suddenly being in life-or-death situations with nobody to lean on. His need to be infallible functions as a defense mechanism and goes hand-in-hand with his desire to categorize and predict his surroundings. If he has a code (which he wrote himself) to live by, and he's always right, he never needs to deal with uncertainty. If he takes all the appropriate precautions and surrounds himself with his weird little child army, he'll always be safe, and he won't ever be a scared little boy ever again.
► Just as important, and very much related, is the fact that Simon is a selfish and callous person. Part of this is just standard for Apex members: they believe that the train exists solely for their entertainment, and that beings without numbers are functionally nonsentient. Hurting and killing "nulls", as they refer to train denizens, isn't a crime -- it's a neutral action, and it's their right to take it. But you can't just say that Simon drank the Kool-Aid and forget to mention that he also mixed it: Simon wrote the Apex bylaws, and he was an active participant in the creation of their mythos. Even in the context of the cult, and even before his other half starts to evolve as a person, his lack of empathy stands out. When Jesse, a potential recruit, leaves the train in front of him and Grace, Simon writes him off as weak and Grace, who literally just tried to kill Jesse's friend, is the one who has to tell him to show respect. Once Grace begins to change over the course of their journey, Simon's continued lack of regard for denizens stands out all the more. He and Tuba, Hazel's surrogate mother who is also a gorilla, spend an episode working together and seeming to build some kind of rapport, but once he sees the opportunity, he kills her and denies her personhood without a second thought. Once he breaks the news to the others, he's surprised at the negative response.
► Simon feels a deep antipathy for train denizens in large part because of the Cat, a denizen who took him in upon his arrival on the train and who then, in his view, left him to die. Accordingly, his abandonment issues can be seen from space! While the Cat never intended to leave him, losing her in what he deemed a selfish act hurt, and almost dying at the hands of a Gohm was a truly traumatic experience. He describes the symptoms of a panic attack while he's trapped in a cabin with her, but instead of ever, like, confronting any of these issues, he tars all denizens with the same posttraumatic brush. Being left behind by his caretaker left him with a need for security and purpose, both of which Grace and the Apex give him in spades. He accordingly takes his role in the Apex very seriously, which Grace calls him out on when they're alone and he continues his stoic co-leader act, and refuses to question its tenets even when the person who inspired them tells him it's nonsense.
His blind loyalty, however, comes with a switch that's not hard to flick: if Simon feels abandoned or lied to, he can turn on a person he cares about just as easily as he turned on Tuba. Initially confused and angry about Grace "not acting how she should", he rejects her utterly when he learns that she kept Hazel's true nature from him, something which he perceives as lying and betrayal instead of, you know, trying to keep him from murdering a six year old. He likens her to the Cat when he confronts her on this, and he leaves her behind to die, trapped in her own memories, blaming her for his own actions like the narcissist he is.
► Simon is deeply codependent with his best friend Grace, who saved his life when the Cat left him behind, and a lot of who he sees himself as is reliant on being her second-in-command. They've known and protected each other for years, and she is in a very real sense his only peer on the Train -- the Apex kids and prospective recruits are mostly still children, and more subordinates than friends. While he's got a very obvious crush on her, he seems content not to push it at all, which would make perfect sense even if Grace were interested. Change is scary and unknown! Being each others' right hand and existing in a constant state of nostalgia is fun and static!
He relies on her, and she relies on him, but it's clear that Simon is the one who leans harder on their friendship. Part of him still sees Grace as a savior, and it's undeniable that without the train they probably wouldn't have been friends: she's charismatic and spontaneous and pretty, described by the show's writers as a "mean girl", and he's just kind of an uptight nerd. Grace bonding with Hazel is the key to her personal growth, and for all his lofty talk about the Apex, a huge part of why Simon's so angry at Grace changing, whether his dumb rat ass knows it or not, is that he feels like he's being replaced. Hazel knows things about Grace that he doesn't. Grace is shutting him out and letting Hazel in, taking her side for reasons he can't comprehend, and enforcing actual boundaries when the two of them have never had those before.
► When he actually cares about someone else, he is devoted. Or, you know, he is until he decides they've betrayed him. The tenderness Simon feels towards Grace is real, but it's hollow, in a way even he doesn't fully recognize until after his canon point. He supports her and defers to her, and starts out trusting her unconditionally, but the Grace Simon cares about is the version of Grace he perceives. In Le Cat Chalet Car, his statement that "I'm always with you" is honest, but it hinges on the fact that Grace still doesn't want her number to go down. He's loyal and caring while they're still thinking the same way and valuing the same things, when he sees her as a borderline extension of himself. Despite his clear desperation for positive feedback and affection from others, he's unwilling to engage with her as an actual person with separate feelings. Honestly, it's doubtful he'd know how to even if he wanted to.
► God... he's just a dork. He's just a dweeby little dork who should have been born 10 years earlier so he could be arguing online about why Firefly needs to get renewed. Simon's hobbies are fairly connected to his need for control, narrative and otherwise -- the Cat actually calls him out on this, asking him if Grace should be acting like "one of [his] toy soldiers" -- but they are also classic nerd activities. He paints miniatures and makes little dioramas of them, and he is currently one book into a fantasy trilogy which will never be finished on account of him being dead. He can get a little bent out of shape over being messed with in this regard, especially with Grace, which probably speaks to a deep-rooted insecurity. Once you're on a death train to nowhere, it doesn't really matter that you like miniatures and fantasy novels, but he's still aware of the fact that this wasn't always the case. He and Grace both thrive on the semi-absurd spectacle that is the Apex, and when we see him as their leader he's fully embraced the anime villain aesthetic: his hair is down, he's gotten jacked out of nowhere, he's been indoctrinating the children with anti-Grace propaganda that they're all able to chant about on the spot, and he's wearing an army jacket over his tank top. Just because he's a genuine threat at the time doesn't mean it's not a very cringey teenager's idea of what a charismatic leader would be like!
► Because change is anathema to Simon, he's stubborn to the point of outright stupidity. "Set in his ways" is probably a better way to describe this, because when he balks at something it's almost always because to accept it would challenge his view of the world. He'd rather climb up the walls and look for vents than follow the train's rules, and he repeatedly attempts to attack Amelia after she makes it clear that he can't accomplish anything by doing so. He makes no effort to conceal disinterest or disgust when he feels it; in fact, he's generally an honest person, even when he absolutely shouldn't be. When they're convincing Hazel to join the Apex, Grace has to continually keep interrupting him as he blurts out alienating statements, and he's straightforward about admitting he murdered her mother figure in cold blood.
► While he's ambiguously around 18, he is emotionally immature. Like, stunningly immature. Simon's view of the world is still the one he and Grace cobbled together from next to nothing: it's their world, everything belongs to them, and it's their job to help other kids see that and commit to the same hedonistic philosophy. Being called a child is a major point of contention for him, and so is behavior that makes him feel small, like Amelia laughing in his face. He repeatedly insists that he's not a child anymore and that he knows what he's doing, and at the same time he's hurling things around and punching walls like a child having a tantrum.
► All of these absolutely nightmarish personality traits can easily coexist with the fact that Simon is also a teenage boy with only one and a half pantlegs who blushes easily, laughs genuinely at the jokes of someone who he's going to murder in 2.5 minutes, and, and I cannot stress this enough, is writing his own fantasy trilogy and making his own dioramas for said fantasy trilogy. He contains multitudes! And he's capable of acting nice, sort of, but fake-nice Simon gives off an eerie, put-on cool youth pastor energy that's supposed to be discomfiting.
► While Simon has no powers himself, he does use a pair of gravity-altering (or magnetic? but if it's magnets I have no idea how this lets him run up the side of a tree) boots that enable him to walk up walls and even stand upside down on ceilings when activated. He uses these, along with the Apex-standard harpoon packs, to explore the train with impunity, and he seems to relish opportunities to get a higher vantage point. Even without his boots, he's able to shimmy up pillars and scale walls with above average agility.
Regains:
Harpoon Pack - A grey backpack-like device with a red symbol on the chestplate and two rods that shoot grappling tethers.
Lipstick - Dark red, and looks like it's been used.
Rise of the True King - A spiral notebook which contains the first book of a fantasy novel called the "Esmoroth Trilogy", handwritten, with a foreword.
Miniature Kit - A box containing everything you need to paint your own toy soldiers*! *Paint not included. (RENEWABLE)
Chef's Ensemble - A chef's hat and an apron that reads "Kiss The Shellf."
Gravity Boots - A pair of boots with metal attachments.
Number Tracker - A weird steampunk-looking compass thing with a green screen. Try as you might, it doesn't seem to actually do or show anything.
Cat - A life-sized stuffed toy of a fluffy white cat who seems to be judging you.
Nailbat - It's a bat with nails in it!
Arctic Cowboy Brand Deodorant For Summer Sports Perspiration - For when you don't need your ripeness giving away your position. (RENEWABLE)
Motives: AHAHAHA ... HA........... HA......
Simon is actually, like, the first person I've played in a murdergame who would kill explicitly to get out of the game! We are how violently he reacts to being snowbound in a cabin with a source of trauma -- being confined in a foreign situation that isn't his Cartoon Network isekai is reason enough. He definitely would be more comfortable with killing a visibly nonhuman character, and would probably prefer not to get his hands dirty, but he'll do what he's gotta do. Threats to Grace and the Apex will work as well, and so would anything that feeds into his dumb ideas about the true conductor! Honestly, he'll be writing mental fanfiction about how this all connects to the Train from jump street regardless of what the mod NPCs are like, so if any motive tells him that they'll support One-One he'll just accept it without question.
Also, and this probably works better if it's a death pileup week and it's later in the game, but if he gets attached enough to enough people on his team, he would absolutely kill someone else if the motive was "everyone on team X can leave."
Sample: oh my god they were roommates (but seriously cw for strangulation, violence, and Simon getting his ass kicked)
Plot Involvement: n/a
Case Involvement: RNG me, baby! Unless my soft yes from earlier ends up being a hard yes, but we'll cross that bridge when we get to it.
Other: Can his unbelievably stupid magnet boots actually work if he regains them?
Player Name: Leah
Player Age: 31
Contact:
-IC Information-
Character Name: Simon Laurent
Character Age: 18
Canon: Infinity Train
Reserve Link: bam
Bottom Line: A callous, self-serious, and emotionally stunted dork/cult leader who redirects his very real trauma by committing his life to a lie and doubling down on that lie at every turn, even at the cost of his life, best friend, and grip on reality.
History: Who could forget dear rat boy?
About: ► Simon's defining feature is his narcissism, and it colors his other traits and behaviors even when that might not be immediately obvious. Whether he's maintaining that uh, actually he definitely won chubby bunny that one time, or trying to murder his best friend, the source is the same: Simon has to be right. He has a childish idea of what the world around him is, and what it should be, and when anything gets in the way of that he reacts explosively. While we don't know much of anything about his past before becoming a passenger, whatever latent selfishness and low empathy he had prior to the Train were compounded and intensified by the inherent trauma of suddenly being in life-or-death situations with nobody to lean on. His need to be infallible functions as a defense mechanism and goes hand-in-hand with his desire to categorize and predict his surroundings. If he has a code (which he wrote himself) to live by, and he's always right, he never needs to deal with uncertainty. If he takes all the appropriate precautions and surrounds himself with his weird little child army, he'll always be safe, and he won't ever be a scared little boy ever again.
► Just as important, and very much related, is the fact that Simon is a selfish and callous person. Part of this is just standard for Apex members: they believe that the train exists solely for their entertainment, and that beings without numbers are functionally nonsentient. Hurting and killing "nulls", as they refer to train denizens, isn't a crime -- it's a neutral action, and it's their right to take it. But you can't just say that Simon drank the Kool-Aid and forget to mention that he also mixed it: Simon wrote the Apex bylaws, and he was an active participant in the creation of their mythos. Even in the context of the cult, and even before his other half starts to evolve as a person, his lack of empathy stands out. When Jesse, a potential recruit, leaves the train in front of him and Grace, Simon writes him off as weak and Grace, who literally just tried to kill Jesse's friend, is the one who has to tell him to show respect. Once Grace begins to change over the course of their journey, Simon's continued lack of regard for denizens stands out all the more. He and Tuba, Hazel's surrogate mother who is also a gorilla, spend an episode working together and seeming to build some kind of rapport, but once he sees the opportunity, he kills her and denies her personhood without a second thought. Once he breaks the news to the others, he's surprised at the negative response.
► Simon feels a deep antipathy for train denizens in large part because of the Cat, a denizen who took him in upon his arrival on the train and who then, in his view, left him to die. Accordingly, his abandonment issues can be seen from space! While the Cat never intended to leave him, losing her in what he deemed a selfish act hurt, and almost dying at the hands of a Gohm was a truly traumatic experience. He describes the symptoms of a panic attack while he's trapped in a cabin with her, but instead of ever, like, confronting any of these issues, he tars all denizens with the same posttraumatic brush. Being left behind by his caretaker left him with a need for security and purpose, both of which Grace and the Apex give him in spades. He accordingly takes his role in the Apex very seriously, which Grace calls him out on when they're alone and he continues his stoic co-leader act, and refuses to question its tenets even when the person who inspired them tells him it's nonsense.
His blind loyalty, however, comes with a switch that's not hard to flick: if Simon feels abandoned or lied to, he can turn on a person he cares about just as easily as he turned on Tuba. Initially confused and angry about Grace "not acting how she should", he rejects her utterly when he learns that she kept Hazel's true nature from him, something which he perceives as lying and betrayal instead of, you know, trying to keep him from murdering a six year old. He likens her to the Cat when he confronts her on this, and he leaves her behind to die, trapped in her own memories, blaming her for his own actions like the narcissist he is.
► Simon is deeply codependent with his best friend Grace, who saved his life when the Cat left him behind, and a lot of who he sees himself as is reliant on being her second-in-command. They've known and protected each other for years, and she is in a very real sense his only peer on the Train -- the Apex kids and prospective recruits are mostly still children, and more subordinates than friends. While he's got a very obvious crush on her, he seems content not to push it at all, which would make perfect sense even if Grace were interested. Change is scary and unknown! Being each others' right hand and existing in a constant state of nostalgia is fun and static!
He relies on her, and she relies on him, but it's clear that Simon is the one who leans harder on their friendship. Part of him still sees Grace as a savior, and it's undeniable that without the train they probably wouldn't have been friends: she's charismatic and spontaneous and pretty, described by the show's writers as a "mean girl", and he's just kind of an uptight nerd. Grace bonding with Hazel is the key to her personal growth, and for all his lofty talk about the Apex, a huge part of why Simon's so angry at Grace changing, whether his dumb rat ass knows it or not, is that he feels like he's being replaced. Hazel knows things about Grace that he doesn't. Grace is shutting him out and letting Hazel in, taking her side for reasons he can't comprehend, and enforcing actual boundaries when the two of them have never had those before.
► When he actually cares about someone else, he is devoted. Or, you know, he is until he decides they've betrayed him. The tenderness Simon feels towards Grace is real, but it's hollow, in a way even he doesn't fully recognize until after his canon point. He supports her and defers to her, and starts out trusting her unconditionally, but the Grace Simon cares about is the version of Grace he perceives. In Le Cat Chalet Car, his statement that "I'm always with you" is honest, but it hinges on the fact that Grace still doesn't want her number to go down. He's loyal and caring while they're still thinking the same way and valuing the same things, when he sees her as a borderline extension of himself. Despite his clear desperation for positive feedback and affection from others, he's unwilling to engage with her as an actual person with separate feelings. Honestly, it's doubtful he'd know how to even if he wanted to.
► God... he's just a dork. He's just a dweeby little dork who should have been born 10 years earlier so he could be arguing online about why Firefly needs to get renewed. Simon's hobbies are fairly connected to his need for control, narrative and otherwise -- the Cat actually calls him out on this, asking him if Grace should be acting like "one of [his] toy soldiers" -- but they are also classic nerd activities. He paints miniatures and makes little dioramas of them, and he is currently one book into a fantasy trilogy which will never be finished on account of him being dead. He can get a little bent out of shape over being messed with in this regard, especially with Grace, which probably speaks to a deep-rooted insecurity. Once you're on a death train to nowhere, it doesn't really matter that you like miniatures and fantasy novels, but he's still aware of the fact that this wasn't always the case. He and Grace both thrive on the semi-absurd spectacle that is the Apex, and when we see him as their leader he's fully embraced the anime villain aesthetic: his hair is down, he's gotten jacked out of nowhere, he's been indoctrinating the children with anti-Grace propaganda that they're all able to chant about on the spot, and he's wearing an army jacket over his tank top. Just because he's a genuine threat at the time doesn't mean it's not a very cringey teenager's idea of what a charismatic leader would be like!
► Because change is anathema to Simon, he's stubborn to the point of outright stupidity. "Set in his ways" is probably a better way to describe this, because when he balks at something it's almost always because to accept it would challenge his view of the world. He'd rather climb up the walls and look for vents than follow the train's rules, and he repeatedly attempts to attack Amelia after she makes it clear that he can't accomplish anything by doing so. He makes no effort to conceal disinterest or disgust when he feels it; in fact, he's generally an honest person, even when he absolutely shouldn't be. When they're convincing Hazel to join the Apex, Grace has to continually keep interrupting him as he blurts out alienating statements, and he's straightforward about admitting he murdered her mother figure in cold blood.
► While he's ambiguously around 18, he is emotionally immature. Like, stunningly immature. Simon's view of the world is still the one he and Grace cobbled together from next to nothing: it's their world, everything belongs to them, and it's their job to help other kids see that and commit to the same hedonistic philosophy. Being called a child is a major point of contention for him, and so is behavior that makes him feel small, like Amelia laughing in his face. He repeatedly insists that he's not a child anymore and that he knows what he's doing, and at the same time he's hurling things around and punching walls like a child having a tantrum.
► All of these absolutely nightmarish personality traits can easily coexist with the fact that Simon is also a teenage boy with only one and a half pantlegs who blushes easily, laughs genuinely at the jokes of someone who he's going to murder in 2.5 minutes, and, and I cannot stress this enough, is writing his own fantasy trilogy and making his own dioramas for said fantasy trilogy. He contains multitudes! And he's capable of acting nice, sort of, but fake-nice Simon gives off an eerie, put-on cool youth pastor energy that's supposed to be discomfiting.
► While Simon has no powers himself, he does use a pair of gravity-altering (or magnetic? but if it's magnets I have no idea how this lets him run up the side of a tree) boots that enable him to walk up walls and even stand upside down on ceilings when activated. He uses these, along with the Apex-standard harpoon packs, to explore the train with impunity, and he seems to relish opportunities to get a higher vantage point. Even without his boots, he's able to shimmy up pillars and scale walls with above average agility.
Regains:
Harpoon Pack - A grey backpack-like device with a red symbol on the chestplate and two rods that shoot grappling tethers.
Lipstick - Dark red, and looks like it's been used.
Rise of the True King - A spiral notebook which contains the first book of a fantasy novel called the "Esmoroth Trilogy", handwritten, with a foreword.
Miniature Kit - A box containing everything you need to paint your own toy soldiers*! *Paint not included. (RENEWABLE)
Chef's Ensemble - A chef's hat and an apron that reads "Kiss The Shellf."
Gravity Boots - A pair of boots with metal attachments.
Number Tracker - A weird steampunk-looking compass thing with a green screen. Try as you might, it doesn't seem to actually do or show anything.
Cat - A life-sized stuffed toy of a fluffy white cat who seems to be judging you.
Nailbat - It's a bat with nails in it!
Arctic Cowboy Brand Deodorant For Summer Sports Perspiration - For when you don't need your ripeness giving away your position. (RENEWABLE)
Motives: AHAHAHA ... HA........... HA......
Simon is actually, like, the first person I've played in a murdergame who would kill explicitly to get out of the game! We are how violently he reacts to being snowbound in a cabin with a source of trauma -- being confined in a foreign situation that isn't his Cartoon Network isekai is reason enough. He definitely would be more comfortable with killing a visibly nonhuman character, and would probably prefer not to get his hands dirty, but he'll do what he's gotta do. Threats to Grace and the Apex will work as well, and so would anything that feeds into his dumb ideas about the true conductor! Honestly, he'll be writing mental fanfiction about how this all connects to the Train from jump street regardless of what the mod NPCs are like, so if any motive tells him that they'll support One-One he'll just accept it without question.
Also, and this probably works better if it's a death pileup week and it's later in the game, but if he gets attached enough to enough people on his team, he would absolutely kill someone else if the motive was "everyone on team X can leave."
Sample: oh my god they were roommates (but seriously cw for strangulation, violence, and Simon getting his ass kicked)
Plot Involvement: n/a
Case Involvement: RNG me, baby! Unless my soft yes from earlier ends up being a hard yes, but we'll cross that bridge when we get to it.
Other: Can his unbelievably stupid magnet boots actually work if he regains them?